By Carl Radford, RPT
(Reprinted with permission from the President's Message in the December, 2012 Partial Post, official newsletter of the North Shore Chapter of the Piano Technicians Guild.)
Grandma got run over by a Baldwin,
Caroling at our house Christmas Eve.
People say there's no such thing as tone-deaf,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
She’d forgot to call the tuner,
So our piano was off-key,
And she’d been drinkin’ too much eggnog,
And was lit up like a freakin’ Christmas tree.
Grandma always tried to sing Soprano,
Even with that frail physique.
But ever since she lost her Beltones,
Her spirit was willing, but brother could she shriek.
Grandma got run over by a Baldwin.
Caroling at our house Christmas Eve.
People say there's no such thing as tone-deaf.
We’re sad she’s gone, but somehow we’re relieved.
We’re not quite sure how it happened.
If she tripped or it was pushed,
But the upright tipped right over,
And poor Grandma got rolled over and got smooshed.
When we found her Christmas mornin',
I’m just telling you the facts,
There were piano parts and dentures,
Next to cookie crumbs and spilled milk elfin tracks.
It's not Christmas without Grandma.
And we’ve shed a tear or two.
But we just can't help but wonder:
Should we fix the upright up or get one new? (Get one new!)
Grandma got run over by a Baldwin.
Caroling at our house Christmas Eve.
People say there's no such thing as tone-deaf.
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
Now the goose is on the table.
And the pudding made of fig.
And the house seems pretty quiet,
Now that Grandma finally found another gig.
I've warned all my friends and neighbors,
Those whose Grandmas like to croon,
“Better keep your piano serviced.”
Or Saint Nick might just drop by and change her tune.
Grandma got run over by a Baldwin.
Caroling at our house Christmas Eve.
People say there's no such thing as tone-deaf.
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe. (Plug your ears!)
Grandma got run over by a Baldwin.
Caroling at our house Christmas Eve.
People say there's no such thing as tone-deaf.
We’re sad she’s gone, but boy are we relieved.